BREAKING: Chuka Umunna to make Labour the “party of the Riff Raff”

Ibiza holiday home-owning plastic socialist, Labour MP, Chuka Umunna has today launched his bowler hat into the ring to become the party’s Leader, with the hope the party “will reclaim its role as the party of ordinary working riff raff.” In a statement to Sky News, the Labour MP for Streatham and cliquey London nightspots, […]

BREAKING NEWS: Ricky Hatton “distraught” over alleged boxing ‘career’

Fat alcoholic burger-binger, Ricky Hatton, has apologised for being caught with a supposed career as a one-time world championship boxer, saying he’s “distraught and distressed” for being considered an athlete at any point during his worthless life.